Lately, I have been exercising the limbic system of my precious brain. I have learned how to control the emotions I have and somehow figured out how to determine the should-have emotions from the must-suppress emotions. It's a bit tricky and confusing. But I know that it doesn't really matter much whatever you choose to feel. 

Someone I know once told me: "Feelings are neither right nor wrong." And I believe so. You can feel something you aren't supposed to feel and yet it stays there. It stays and you like it. Sometimes, you don't feel what you must really feel. Instead, you feel the complete opposite of the feeling. You see, feelings are confusing.

I cherish every feeling I am able to feel. I mean, not everyone is able to experience diverse emotions. Some are just plain insensitive. I don't blame them. At times I wish I could be.

I figured out a way I could get along with my feelings. I learned that if I gave in to the negative I feel, I can manage to sulk over it for a period of time. I swear it's not something highly recommended. Yet if I ignore what I feel and put it aside, it manages to get back at me in a way or another. Not recommended either.

What helps me now is to pause... close my eyes... breath... and smile.

I know it's kinda crazy but it works on me. 

I know I cannot filter what I feel. Although I wish I can. Who wouldn't want that, right? But reality is, we really can't and we should live with the thought that every now and then, we have this emotional tendencies we are not proud of.

Point is, we feel. It's human nature. But we must know when and how to act upon it. I get hurt, but it does not mean I should get a grip and keep a grudge against the person responsible for the pain.

Sometimes, we just need to live with it. Everyday, a lot of things can make us happy. A lot can make us cry too. It just takes a simple decision of whether you want to stay happy or continue crying. I know I don't want to keep on crying. So today I learned that I can say good things. I can react positively towards a sad revelation or a disappointing news. I just have to inhale the reaction until I completely absorb it. It's not easy. Takes practice.  I still lose myself into my feelings sometimes. 

I know I can always try to be happy. I have a bucket of happy memories in the right side of my brain. I know I have them. But we must also accept that sometimes, memories remain as memories and it's all they can ever be. Maybe for now, maybe it can be relived one day. Just hang on to it and cherish the feeling. It will never fade because you felt it at its best.